Addicted to the struggle

Being attached or addicted to “the struggle” causes so many of us a great deal of stress, worry, and pain. What’s up with this? It’s like we prepare for a fight that doesn’t even exist. Do you ever do that?

For many of us, we get stuck in the past because of our need for certainty. Certainty is one of the six basic human needs and is fundamentally about survival. We all need to feel certain that we can avoid pain and, ideally, find some comfort in our lives.  It’s frightening to step into the unknown. It’s difficult to be vulnerable. And it can be overwhelmingly uncomfortable to have that sense of uncertainty about what lies ahead. So we hang on to the past – because even if it’s steeped in pain, it’s what we are familiar with and what we feel certain about.